
If you don’t know how to bluff, you just have to know when to fold.
~ Wisdom of a poker addict

Is like staring at a blue sky covering serene waters
After six years of struggle, the white flag is finally being raised and peace is sowly sinking in, healing my heart. Hugging and asking me come home to life. It felt like forever, when I was wondering where and who I was. Swimming, and lost in time, in self. It was forever when the thirst for writing was burried and sileneced. I’d be dead if I don’t come home to life now. I can’t stay dead forever. Not from this. And not from me. I was running for a long time trying to keep up with life. I kept running and running. Until I forgot why I was running. But I just had to keep running. Then I lost myself and everything became a chaos of failures, disappointments, hope, struggle, fighting, love and more struggle.
It seemed unending - journeying as a college student. The road has finally stopped. Suddenly it’s not a crossroad in front of me. But a mesh of superhighways crisscrossing here and there. I would understand if I’d feel lost now. But I am not. My feet are happily standing still on the ground looking at opportunities, dreams and the future. I have a resolve I intend to live by. I will still live by it - that I will live for the things that truly matter and for the people who are important to me.
I want to write again. Draw again. Colour manga panels. Sing and play the guitar. I want to live again. It’s about time. Life is sweet and it’s a good thing to be alive!
Today I walk holding my naked and fragile heart in my hands.
The world is full of meanies but I will keep walking.
God, help me.

You’re practically my world, honey. ♥
Sharing some personal things online. I took an artwork from pincel3d of DA and tweaked it. So that’s my current desktop atm. I don’t want to grow tired of all the things eating me these days (research papers, school, more papers) so I will just be beaching my weekend away. I am missing my boyfriend already who is dozing soundly right now. I wish everyone well for their weekend. =)
Ps. Honey, I know you’re smiling while reading this. LOL. *handcuffs your heart with mine*
we live to see the mistakes our parents bark
we cry some dying afternoons, hurting because we hurt back.
we grow seedless tears
squeezing our hearts empty
for every bit we do out of the box,
the box they created for us
the box they created for themselves
we are part our mothers,
part our fathers
locked in years spent in sepia
where we love, hate and learn.
but most of all,
we are ourselves.
innocent, toothless and clueless grins
trapped in forgotten moments of young years.
embraced and rejected millions of times
by harmless words that scar.
we walk on unknowing but wanting
to find some place to belong
some place to smile
and be the old souls that we are
innocent, toothless and clueless grins.